The Great Undecided Voter Checklist

I've never understood undecided voters. And I've never made that a secret. I just don't get what makes them tick. Either you're for something or you're against it. It's pretty simple to me. With McCain looking to close the gap on his status as underdog, it's time we do something about this.

I guess my normal forgiving nature has changed this year, because now more than ever I just don't get undecided voters. What is it that makes things so muddy for you?

For those still confused, please take the following test.

The Great Undecided Voter Checklist

Instructions: print up this list and check the boxes next to the positions you agree with. Just like a Cosmo quiz, once you're done, add up who you agreed with the most--Obama or McCain. The one you agreed with the most is your winner. It really is that simple!!!

Taxes
[ ] Obama wants to cut taxes for the middle class and close loopholes for the rich and big business.
[ ] McCain wants to cut taxes for business and the rich, hoping the rest will trickle down.


Higher Education
[ ] Obama wants to fund higher education and believes higher education is a fundamental right.
[ ] McCain wants to re-do the way in which higher education financing is done.

K-12 Education
[ ] Obama supports fully funding programs like No Child Left Behind and invoking merit pay for teachers in a way that promotes good education without stripping teachers of their right to unionize.
[ ] McCain supports vouchers so that parents can take their kids out of public school and put them in private schools and let the public schools deteriorate.

Energy
[ ] Obama wants to invest in alternative fuels starting on day 1.
[ ] McCain wants to drill baby drill until we find an answer.

Foreign Policy
[ ] Obama wants to use diplomacy and meet with foreign leaders--even those we disagree with--in order to foster a dialogue and perhaps prevent catastrophes.
[ ] McCain wants to show muscle to Iran and Iraq.

Reproductive rights
[ ] Obama believes it is a woman's right to chose and that Roe v. Wade was properly decided.
[ ] McCain mocks the "health of the mother" exception and thinks Roe v. Wade was wrong.

War in Iraq
[ ] Obama did not support the invasion or the surge and thinks we should leave soon.
[ ] McCain supported the invasion and the surge and thinks we should stay longer.

Gay Rights
[ ] Obama believes in civil unions and gay rights.
[ ] McCain does not agree with civil unions or gay marriage and finds support from the factions of society that use hate as a tool against gays.

Equal Pay
[ ] Obama flew back to D.C. to vote for the Ledbetter Act.
[ ] McCain voted against the Ledbetter Act.

Health Care
[ ] Obama wants to start a national health care program where no one is left without health care coverage.
[ ] McCain wants to privatize health care and give a tax incentive for buying on the open market, leaving loopholes for companies to deny coverage.

Social Security
[ ] Obama wants a strong social security benefit.
[ ] McCain would like to privatize social security.

Judicial Philosophy
[ ] Obama believes that the Constitution is a living document that needs to be interpreted by not only reviewing the history behind it, but the intent and the precedent which has discussed it over the years.
[ ] McCain is a strict textualist believing the Constitution has a fixed meaning that provides for certain rights and not others.

So what's the problem? Make a decision already!!!!!!