Thursday, January 24, 2008

Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahhahaha

I've always known that Kwame was as shady as a willow tree on a hot summer's day, but this shit is just hilarious. I mean, come on--why would you put this stuff in a TEXT MESSAGE. You are supposedly an educated man--you should know that this stuff is public record WHEN IT'S ON YOUR CITY ISSUED PHONE.

CITY ISSUED PHONE.

At least get a second cellie for Christ's sake. And way to lie under oath.

When I read the excerpted text messages last night I was laughing so hard. I mean, come on. How tacky?

Here's a few:

9/24/2002, 6:56 p.m.

CB: This is one of those little things I had to tell you. Last night when I was laying on your shoulder in the car and you held my face and sang whatever song it was, that felt so good. It was just one of those little moments when you just made me fall some more.

9/28/2002, 11:53 p.m.

CB: Where are you now?

KK: At home waiting for all EP [executive protection unit officers] to leave. Where are you?

CB: At the residence inn in Madison hgts.

KK: What rm?

CB: ...I'm in room 311 in bldg 3 in the back.

10/7/2002, 11:20 p.m.

CB: OK, I'm feeling like I want another night like the most recent Saturday at the Residence Inn! You made me feel so damn good that night. As you can see I can't let it go! ...

KK: I feel that we can do that in WV [West Virginia] + just relax together. I need you soooo bad. I want to wake up in the morning and you are there. Make it happen. Love ya.

10/31/2002, 5:28 p.m.

KK: I'll feel better once I'm holding you.

CB: You didn't say whether or not we are trying for some time tonight.

KK: Definitely. I'm getting a room. Damn that!

CB: LOL. Okie dokie.

(Kilpatrick later tells her to pick up room key at Marriott)

11/1/2002, 12:28 a.m.

KK: 6301 or 6302?

CB: Definitely 6302! 6301 has two double beds.

4/8/2003, 8:55 p.m.

KK: I'm at Laker game. The security doesn't believe I'm mayor. Mike is pulling out all kind of shirt to prove it.

CB: And, did you miss me, sexually?

KK: Hell yeah! You couldn't tell. I want some more. Don't sleep!

In the immortal words of Napoleon Dynamite: "GROSS!"

And who admits to shit via text message?

May 15, 2003, 11:02 a.m.

Beatty: I'm sorry that we are going through this mess because of a decision that we made to fire Gary Brown. I will make sure that the next decision is much more thought out. Not regretting what was done at all, but thinking about how we can do things smarter.

Kilpatrick: True! It had to happen though. I'm all the way with that!

Geeze Louise.

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